"I didn't want to kill myself but I didn't want to live," a somber Shania Twain said in an interview that aired Tuesday on 'The Oprah Winfrey Show.' "Our lives were intertwined in every respect and I really was completely shocked."

The country music superstar was, of course, talking about her mindset in the aftermath of finding out her husband of 14 years, Robert "Mutt" Lange, was having an inappropriate relationship with one of her closest friends, Marie-Anne Thi�baud, who was also a secretary at the couple's Switzerland chateau. (Both Mutt and Marie-Anne continue to deny the claims.)

Shania revealed to Oprah that she took what she calls a "pathetic" measure to repair her marriage, writing a letter to Marie-Anne and asking, "Why are you torturing me? Let it go, please. Find love somewhere else from someone else."